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As a mother and a doctor, I know you are sometimes worried and afraid, overwhelmed and overstretched. But your families depend on you to be their foundation. You're imperfect. And that's okay.
Because you are something better.
You're whole, fierce, and unshakeable.
ALL RECENT POSTS:
When you’re a medical student, your dreams are as big as mountains. Vast, seemingly limitless. You dream of travel, your possible future partner, where you will work and climb the ladder. As a resident, you start to let medical culture mould you. You choose a speciality and adopt its personality. You start to grow a […]
You will never find joy as a mother until you recognize that the societal expectations of mothers are TOXIC and are designed to make you doubt your self-worth. These expectations thrive on a steady dose of unhealthy comparison. Maybe you need to leave home before your kids go to school because you round on your […]
This essay is as true today as it was when I wrote it a few years ago. When I wrote it, my editor asked me “Dawn, are you sure you want to share this?” Why does a doctor’s pain go unnoticed? It’s because we are too afraid to be vulnerable. Daily practice. Small steps. Move […]
Imagine this: You wake up, pee, and then take a shower… Wait, what—was that a dream? (Right? Aren’t there about 20 missing steps in that sequence???) Whether you’re the only one to react to the dirty sock lying next to the hamper, the first one who steps up to say YES to help a sick […]
Have you accepted that being busy is part of your life? As a mother-doctor, you have so many identities. I know that people come to you with their needs because you are known to get $#it done. Maybe you feel proud that you can get it all done? mother/wife/daughter/doctor/peacemaker/homework checker/grocery shopper/sports coach/listkeeper/RSVPer/gift buyer/shoelace finder/housekeeper/dinner maker/dinner […]
One of my classmates used to be in the habit of not saying a definite yes or no to a proposed outing. “Maybe” kept her options open (at least, this was her reasoning). But did she really invite freedom into her schedule? In my mind, she just ended up with a huge pile of “work […]
“I’m so burnt out. I’m failing my patients!” “I want work life balance, but how?” “Will my kids resent my career?” Do you have these thoughts? If so, how many days (or years…or decades) have gone by since you first felt this way? And what has changed since then? If you’re in a better space […]
Even better than “having it all” is being very clear with what you want in the first place. Your “all” and my “all” are going to be different. But if you accept society’s definition of “all”, you might be chasing a lot of things without 100% energy–ultimately gaining very little happiness in the process. My family recently […]
I was at a conference for women leaders recently. One of the participants shared a vulnerable story about how people often took advantage of her kind nature. And then she started to tear up. “Why do I always need to be the one to change? What’s wrong with being me?” Every woman in that room […]
In her inspiring TED talk, Tiffany Dufu calls a woman’s need to perfectly manage every aspect of the household the “home control disease.” Others call it the invisible mental load that tends to fall more on women in heterosexual partnerships. No matter what you call it, it’s the patriarchy baked into gendered norm expectations. No […]
